Managing difficult feelings around world events

Radical acceptance is the practice of fully acknowledging and embracing the present moment, including its difficulties and discomforts, without trying to change or control it. That doesn’t mean you can’t make a difference – just that you need to accept the current reality to be able to make effective decisions. You can practise radical acceptance in this context by acknowledging that:  

• Your personal experiences might influence any strong thoughts or reactions you might have towards current events – a valid, natural reaction 
• It’s perfectly understandable to feel however you do 
• What occurs in the world is largely out of your control. There are actions you can take, such as engaging in advocacy, but the weight of these world events are not yours to shoulder alone.

We recognise this is easier said than done! A helpful mantra is: it’s okay to consume the news, but try not to let it consume you. To create digital boundaries, you could: 

• Limit news sources to those you trust. Choose news sites or newsletters from journalists or media outlets that use reliable, evidence-based sources.  
• Ask someone you know, like a friend or whānau member, to check the news for you. They could keep you informed about any key developments.  
• Engage with the news intentionally. Constantly engaging with media content can feel overwhelming.To read an article or watch a video ‘intentionally’, pick just one and spend time away from the news before and after reading it. This can help you to feel a sense of control over the media you consume.  
• Switch off news, app or social media notifications where you can. Make it easier to stay offline! 
• Leave unproductive conversations about politics, online. Don’t feel obliged to keep discussing politics with people if the conversation becomes intense and unproductive. It’s perfectly acceptable to remove yourself from the conversation. If you can, shift to another space, such by taking a walk or sitting outside/in te taiao, to help to move your mood.

Feeling connected to the people around us can make us feel safe, and provide us with a sense of belonging. A lot of what we see in the news centres around disharmony and disconnection, but we can combat these narratives by making our own communities stronger, together. 

To connect with your community, you could:  

• Volunteer. You might find a pen pal service or mentoring programme you can join, or help out at a meal service like Sunday Blessings in Tāmaki Makaurau.  
• Make a small gesture for a loved one. Make a card, bake a sweet treat, or save your loved one from a boring job like mowing the lawn. Acts of unexpected kindness can go a long way, and can help to boost our wellbeing. 
• Attend a vigil. There are often local vigils or memorials after significant tragedies; you may be able to learn about these through social media or local news.  
• Organise mutual aid. Joining a local Facebook group, or a community group chat, can alert you to neighbours in need. You could organise a one-off or regular donation of food or supplies to people in your community who need it.  
• Share a meal with neighbours, or organise a neighbourhood potluck. 
• Spend time with your whānau or chosen whānau. You might not have the energy to do much more right now. That’s okay. Taking care of yourself and strengthening your whānau bonds are important too.  
• Discuss what’s going on with your whānau or tamariki/children. Discussing current events with your tamariki in a hopeful and age-appropriate way could be helpful, not just for their own understanding of the world, but also to bring a sense of clarity and hope for yourself. 

Taking actions that reflect our beliefs can be affirming, and help us regain a sense of control and mastery. How you choose to take action could look different depending on the cause you care about, and the capacity you have available.

• First, assess your capacity. How much time and  energy do you have to give to the causeright now? If you’re low on capacity, you could take a less intensive approach, perhaps by writing an email, joining an online group or sending a donation to a fundraiser. Think about what’s realistic for you, and understand your limits.  
• Join a lived experience or peer support group, to be a part of their advocacy. Peer support or lived experience groups can be great forums to bounce ideas around, share opportunities for change, and/or find support at the same time. If you’re not part of a community or peer support group, you can find one here. 
• Write a submission. If a law or policy you care about is undergoing public consultation, you might be able to make a submission on it. A submission is a written document, or an oral presentation (submitted face-to-face, or via phone or video call), where you can share views and recommendations with a select committee on a topic they’ve asked for public feedback on. Written and/or oral submission/s can be as short, or as long, as you want them to be. For more guidance on making a submission, watch this video or read this guide.  
• Sharing a creative piece for the cause. You may find that thinking about your cause has inspired an artistic venture, and you’ve created something beautiful in the process. You might want to share this piece of art – writing, painting, or dance for example - with others, or you may want to keep it for your own enjoyment.  
• Attend a protest. Protests like the hīkoi against the Treaty Principles Bill can be a good way to feel solidarity and community, while making yourself heard. Ensure you go with someone you trust and understand your rights and responsibilities as a protestor.  
• Encourage your friends or whānau to join you in taking action. Advocating for change together can help you to feel connected to the people around you, and bring you a sense of hope and purpose during difficult times.  

We all have mental health and wellbeing, and we all need to look after it. To continue to look after your wellbeing, you could: 

• Try box breathing, whenever you feel big emotions. Box breathing is breathing in the shape of a box. This practice can help you achieve a feeling of calm in any time and place. Watch this video for a demonstration. 
• Share how you’re feeling with people you trust. Sharing our emotions and experiences with others can lessen their impact, and help us feel validated. You could have a kōrero in person/kanohi-ki-te-kanohi, over a video or phone call or even over a text to begin with.  
• Remind yourself of your strengths. It’s easy to feel a loss of confidence when we’re overwhelmed by negative feelings. Remind yourself of experiences and actions you’ve taken in the past, that you’re proud of. If you’re it finding it difficult to think of an action you’re proud of, you could ask a loved one to share what they see as your strengths. Keep a visual reminder of these strengths, such as a written note or picture, to remind yourself during tough times. 
• Sleep. Stress can negatively disrupt our sleeping patterns, and affect our wellbeing. Try doing what you can to minimise the barriers to good sleep, such as reducing your screentime right before bedtime, practising a wind-down routine, or finding soothing audio or sleep meditations to listen to. You can find these for free on YouTube from organisations like Calm and Headspace.  
• Have fun. It sounds simple, but we often don’t prioritise having fun when we’re experiencing low wellbeing. Engaging with your hobbies or connecting with friends are important aspects of a fulfilling life.  
• Te Whare Tapa Whā. Think about the pou of your own Whare Tapa Whā - is there any area that could be stronger? Bringing your personal Te Whare Tapa Whā back into balance could help you to sustain wellbeing. 
• Seek professional support, if you need to. There’s no shame in reaching out for support, if you feel you need something more. You could start by making an appointment with your GP (who could refer you for support). If you want to speak to someone more urgently, check out our list of helplines.  
• Make a plan for any future news events. What activities or actions have helped you achieve a sense of calm and control during this news period? You could make a plan with any insights for future stressful news events, such as an upcoming election, and share that plan with someone you trust. This plan could help you to feel prepared ahead of time.